Words that aren't coming out

Quanter of a year
That's how long since I've been gone
away from this place
in between many a times
I stopped by
looked at the white sheet
stared hard and yet
words just didn't come out
up to now it still doesn't come out
words.. seems like i've forgotten how to emote
like i've locked my feelings
bottled them up tightly
that even words don't come out anymore

and still it hurts, especially here in the heart
with too much to hold
and too little to be shared
and too exhausting
too far gone....

Reunion?

It's the time of the year, when my classmates decide to have gathering. It has always been May 1st. This year it would mark the 10 years anniversary. Oh God, i can't believe it has been 10 years since i graduated from form 5. Hahaha, 10 damn long years.

And yet, I have never been to one of the gatherings held in this 10 years. I guess I am the only one who has never gone for it (that's what I believe). Why? Maybe because I am a loner, or maybe because i never felt belonged in that class. I guess both may have some truth in it. I never liked to gatherings, it's a time where people ask too many questions, where people compare one another life as of now, who is doing what, how much you are earning, got boyfriend/girlfriend or not. I hate those questions, (and this stems from personal experiences). when I went back to my primary school, the first thing my teachers will say is "wah, you still so fat huh??!!". WTF lar, I know my classmates wouldn't do that, but it's been ingrained in me, it has hurt me too much, that i never attend any of those gatherings unless it is held by the closest of close friends that I have (the ones i still keep in contact with). Whereas, I have really never felt belonged in that class, i guess my classmate would say the same of me. Mostly because i was too immersed in prefectorial board, that i neglected my class. In the end, i ended on not so very good terms with both my classmates and my prefect mates.